Archive for August, 2009

by Laura-kim, single mom, recently divorced with 2 kids and the author of the blog Harrassed Mom

We were 3 adults and 6 children ranging in age from 2 to 7 years old, both boys and girls. (yes me and my friends have many many children).

It really is a cheap way to spend the morning and the kids seem to enjoy it. It was R80 for 2 adults and 5 children (including the 2 year old). Which really is very reasonable.

It isn’t a huge museum and is probably a little outdated but really not much changes about the history of dinosaurs or the food chain so I suppose there is no real need to update the way it all looks.

There is a fair amount of interaction in some of the exhibits. The children get to press buttons and lights shine up or noises are made. The winner was the spitting cobra that spits out water – like a huge snake shaped water gun.

Even though a lot did pass the smaller two by they didn’t get bored and almost seemed to enjoy it more than the older bunch.

They have 4 halls of exhibits – two upstairs – The Hall of Life and The Mammal Hall that house the dinosaurs and other animals. They have a lovely exhibit of the ape men. It is very life like and probably the part I enjoyed the most. Then there is one in the middle floor which is the Geoscience Museum and the one Cameron enjoys the most. It has a large collection of semi precious stones and other rocks. There is even some Moon Rock there that was presented to us by Richard Nixon.

The hall downstairs is the Austin Roberts Bird Hall – which obviously consists of birds – many many birds. ( Transvaal Museum overview)

It was a lovely morning. The kids had fun and they do actually get something educational out of it and never seem to tire of it. My kids have been twice now and we saw stuff this time we didn’t notice the last time!

Remember it next time it’s a rainy day!

For more information about the Transvaal Museum click here

by Sally Cameron, midwife, mother of 2 and co-owner of www.earthbabies.co.za . I am a passionate, creative, trying to be Green unschooling single mom. . It’s a journey.

The new buzz word is Green and all thing Eco. People are becoming more aware of the need to think about the impact of our lives on the planet.  Being a greener parent is not about suddenly becoming vegetarian, living in a yurt and wearing tie dye.  None of us like change very much and our society pushes fast, convenient and easy as the best ways to do most things.  Green parenting just involves taking a step back and looking at what we do as parents.  Does some of what we do have a negative impact on the environment?  Are there other simple things we could do to get ourselves and our kids more involved in thinking about the planet and doing things that benefit the environment?

Trying to make too many changes at once will just be overwhelming and in the end it is easy just to give the whole thing up as being too hard.  Change needs to be slow and sustainable and once you have one area of your life a little greener then you can move on to the next area.

Here are just a few ideas to inspire you toward being a greener parent.

- Reduce your waste!

Every child in disposable nappies from birth to 2 produces 2 tons of non biodegradable waste. We tested this figure for ourselves and it is probably rather conservative if the current trends in later potty training are featured in.  Gone are the days of folding and pinning cloth nappies, the modern cloth nappies are easy to use, leak proof, totally machine washable and can save you as much as R9000. Think of supporting one of the South African brands to ensure you nappies have the lowest possible carbon footprint.  For more info on the South African brands of cloth nappies visit www.earthbabies.co.za

- Food

While it would be financially impossible for most of us to switch to a totally organic diet, we do need to be more aware of where our food comes from and what is in it. There are some fantastic organic vegetable box schemes around the country as well as local produce markets where you can get fresh local organic food.  Start by adding one organic box to your household a month. The fewer pesticides and other toxic chemicals that are used in the production of your food the better for the planet and for your family. Cost can be a consideration but if you cut out 1-2 meat meals a week you can put the extra money toward organic veggies. (see some of these health food outlets)

- Get Kids involved

We have to show our kids that it is important to us and they have to see us doing our little bits around the home before they will take it on board as being something they need to focus on. Get them to help sort stuff out for recycling. Talk about saving water by not running the tap while brushing teeth, explain about turning off lights and electronic equipment that is not in use. Watch documentaries on the environment, read books about stuff kids can do, get them out into nature to see what it is that they are protecting

- Start Planting

Even very small children like planting and watching things grow, one great way to get more organic food into kids is to grow it yourself. They are also more likely to eat something they have grown themselves. Start on a small scale, you dont have to plant a whole vegetable garden. A few pots or troughs are a great way to start.

- Use natural laundry products

Normal laundry detergent is very harsh on the environment and rivers and wild life. Consider a natural/eco friendly alternative of which there are quite a few varieties Triple orange , Enchantrix, soap nuts, Ceramic and Magnetic wash balls . As an added bonus all of these are a lot kinder to babies and childrens skin which can be very sensitive to chemical used in most detergents

- Buy or use second hand where possible

Everything we buy for our babies used natural resources to make and often a lot of CO2 in the process. Baby furniture, clothes and toys are very expensive and have a short practical life so a lot land on the rubbish dump quite quickly, look at using preloved or buying 2nd hand. The only non-negotiable necessity is a car seat. It is not advised to buy these second hand so by saving in the above areas you can now spend a little more on buying the safest chair your money can buy

Many people are a bit snobby about 2nd hand stuff and it can be hard to find but try setting up a swop or 2nd hand sale with friends or through a parenting group or nursery school. There are some auction-type site in SA, not as big as overseas but worth trying. Some websites offer place to advertise 2nd hand products too . www.earthbabies.co.za has a section where you can email your stuff you want to sell and we will advertise for you free of charge and the sale happens privately, we make no money out of this service but feel it is a way pre-loved things can find a new home and keep them off the rubbish dump)

With all of these ideas the thing is not to feel guilty about what you are not doing but to start with what you can and move on from there. Good luck in adding a little green to your lives.

by Angel Swemmer creator of Angels Mind:

I’m a coffee-addicted, junk-food-junkie; social-smoking’; single-mom to a teenager. My darling Damien (AKA Knucklehead) has ADHD and it makes our rollercoaster slash bumpercar ride very interesting! More about me below but here’s our visit.

Monday being a public holiday, we decided to make the most of the gawjiss weather we’ve been having and took ourselves off to Maropeng, in the cradle of humankind

It’s easy enough to find on any GPS, and the directions aren’t difficult, as I am extremely directionally challenged and need a really good map to get anywhere… thankfully today my Glugster was doing the driving.

Arriving at Maropeng was easy enough, and strolling out of the parking lot into a practically invisible circular group of buildings called “The Market Place”, with a little snack shop and typical touristy curio shop was nice surprise! My son immediately shot into a shop with a HUGE sabre toothed cat skull on display!

You can buy tickets for the tour in the market place, but you can also walk straight up the path and get tickets inside the main building too. I was a little surprised by the ticket price to be honest- R95 an adult or R55 for kids between 4 and 14! You can also get a combined ticket which includes a visit to the Sterkfontein Caves for R150/ adult and R90/ child. Sterkfontein is a short drive away mind you- it’s not all in the same place. And I was a little miffed when we arrived at Sterkfontein this afternoon, waited for the 4PM cave tour, and went through the fascinating exhibition centre only to find a sign saying that if you’re asthmatic or claustrophobic, or battle with your back and such, you should rather not do the cave tour!

But back to Maropeng. I didn’t look at the website or anything before we went, so I had no idea what I was in for, and it made it rather interesting! On entering the building, we got our combined tickets, and then headed down a circular staircase into a long circular passage that made up a timeline going backwards! At the bottom of the passage, you go through a door and wait your turn to get into a little round boat thingy made for 4 people… and its launching and bouncing around a little had me squealing- which had my two men giggling at me! It takes you on a ride through a glacier and then erupting volcanoes replete with noise and smoke- and they even make provision for prams and wheelchairs! You go on the boat and they meet you at the end with your wheels! And trust me- you will need the wheels… it’s a lot of walking!

After the boat ride, there’s a bridge through a tunnel that rotates. This had my two men in hysterics AGAIN because as soon as I took a couple of steps I was sure the bridge was tilting up and to the right and I clung to the rails for dear life! It got me squealing again, and I couldn’t let go! Eventually on my Glugster’s advice I closed my eyes and I could walk through the thing okay… but no worries- you can go around it, though I’m sure the kidlets would love it!

The hall with the displays in it is huge, and all the exhibits are numbered so if you want to you can follow them in order. Me… being big kid I am… I practically ran from one display to the other in excitement!

It’s completely interactive! Buttons and lights and levers and things to look at and look into and feel and things moving and big bubbles with skulls in hanging from the ceiling! The many kids in the place had an absolute blast, and it’s just as interesting for grownups! They even have actual fossils in another hall- under glass with magnifying glasses- so you can have a good look at them!

When we eventually got outside we were ravenous! The fast food place immediately outside the exit was exceptionally reasonably priced- but the service was dreadful! There’s no real signage pointing out other eateries so EVERY body stops right there! By the time we got there they were out of coke and milkshakes! If you keep walking there is another restaurant, back in what they call The Market Place, and there’s the Tumulus restaurant inside the visitor’s centre as well. Walking back to the market place and the parking lot is quite a ways- and if you’re willing to climb some serious stairs there’s quite a nice view from the top of the visitor’s centre. We did the climb, albeit slowly!

Myself and my Glugster, and the knucklehead and his girlfriend- at 18 and 17 years old respectively- all had a wonderful day! Take a day, and take your camera!

Angel Swemmer on Angel Swemmer : I love my cellphone, my camera and my notebook. I’ve never been married, and despite my plans to the contrary- I am now living with a delicious, wonderful man who spoils me rotten! We’re about to get engaged, we’re trying to get pregnant, and I am planning our wedding!

I have seven tattoos and three cats, and when I grow up I want to be one of those strange ladies that people are a little afraid of ‘coz she walks around in public in huge, purple, flower bedecked hats and feather-boas.

Come play on my rollercoaster.

by Gina Jacobson. Gina is a wife, a mom, a leo.  She works for a  non-profit organisation.  Is a procrastinator. Loves sci-fi, sushi, good books and Scrabble.  Her blog is made up of A Bit of This a Bit of That.

When I submitted my leave form for my four months maternity leave I could already feel the anxiety of coming back to work, of leaving my itty bitty tiny baby at home, of spending eight hours away from him.  Then, quicker than you can say stinky nappy my maternity leave was up and I was going back to work.

Here’s a secret most women would never admit to… I was so relieved to be going back to work!  Eight hours of no crying, no feeding, no pooping baby.  I was giddy with excitement.

I felt so guilty.  Guilty that I didnt feel guilty.  So guilty and ashamed that I never said a word, not to my husband, not to my mom, not even to the women on my internet mommy group.  Im not a career woman, I dont hold a high powered job and I am not the main breadwinner in our family, so it definitely wasnt a need to get back to my job that sent me running out the door every morning.  It was plain and simple a desire to not have to deal with my baby.  Dont get me wrong I love him like my last breath and would walk the fires of hell and back to keep him safe and make him happy.I just needed ‘my’ time.

I spent months feeling like a teenage boy sneaking his dads skin mags until I realised that I was entitled to feel relieved at having time to myself, of being able to switch my brain from baby mode to adult mode.  Having time to myself calmed me and gave me perspective on my home life.  Ultimately it made me a better mother and wife, at least I feel it has.

Almost two years down the line I feel far more in control of my mommy vs. adult time, so much so that I would love to be able to spend more time at home with the rugrat.  I dont think I could be a stay at home mom, once I got over the guilt of needing time to myself I really enjoyed going back to work.  Hopefully with our next child I will be able to work half day or flexi-time after maternity leave.

The one thing I do know is that I wont feel guilty about not feeling guilty about having ‘my’ time.

by Laura-kim, single mom, recently divorced with 2 kids and the author of the blog Harrassed Mom

I left my ex-husband just over 3 years ago. It has been one long constant fight. We have fought over custody, maintenance, money, medical aid and everything in between. We eventually officially got divorced in February this year.

His relationship with his children has been sporadic. He pitches for a few weekends, gets mad with me and then stays away. We have sort of all come to accept it. Kiara was 2 when we left, so her reality of him is his inconsistency.

He seemed to be making a pretty good effort the last few months though. He missed a few weekends but for the most part was fetching them and seemed to want to be involved. I finally thought we had reached a happy medium.

Then the phone call came. He wanted to take Kiara only. He told Kiara this. I heard it over the phone.

Naturally I refused this option. It is not possible to choose one child over the other when you hit a bump in the road with one. I still am not sure of what happened 100% between my son and his father as I only have his version (and he really doesn’t want to talk about it) and bits and pieces from his sister when she is angry with him and tells how she likes it when her dad is mean to Cameron. (she is 5 she doesn’t understand fully what she is saying).

The basics it seems are that they had a fight. My ex behaved unacceptable and treated Cameron badly. He was mean. Did and said some very mean things that a 7 year old doesn’t have the ability to handle.

I was furious. My son was hurt. He didn’t want to see his father. His father didn’t want to see him – which is worse as he is the adult and should know better.

As a result of all that I laid an ultimatum down. Either my ex sort his issues out with Cameron or he doesnt see either of them.

It was probably the hardest thing I have done with regards to visitation. I never wanted to be that mother who keeps the kids from their father. But my kids emotionally well being and physical safety are at risk here. I can not send them into a situation that neither of them are equipped to deal with – I wouldn’t be doing my job then.

As I expected, he has so far, refused to deal with the issues with Cameron.

Its heartbreaking. Cameron has these issues that I can’t resolve because they are not really my issues and I don’t know what happened. Kiara misses her father.  The only ones who suffer here are the children.

by Sally Cameron, midwife, mother of 2 and co-owner of www.earthbabies.co.za . I am  passionate, creative, trying to be Green unschooling single mom.  It’s a journey.

The idea of birthing a baby into water has been around for quite a long time but was made popular by a French obstetrician Michel Odent in the 70’s and was the first to publish and article in a medical journal on the use of birthing pools. Having had two home waterbirths myself and been present as a midwife at others, it is a way of birthing that I really believe is of great benefit to the mother and the baby. If researching birth options it is really one worth look at.

Benefits of waterbirth:
1)       Allows the mother greater comfort and mobility, it is easy to change positions in the water
2)       Reduction of pressure on the abdomen. Buoyancy promotes more efficient uterine contractions and better blood circulation, resulting in better oxygenation of the uterine muscles, less pain for the mother, and more oxygen for the baby.
3)       Helps the mother save energy, the water supports her weight so that her energy can be used to cope with the contractions.
4)       Relaxes the mother, the more she relaxes the more effectively she dilates and labour time is reduced.
5)       Relaxes pelvic floor muscles.
6)       Less need for pain medication in labour, the water stimulates the touch and temperature nerve fibres in the skin, this helps to block the sensation from the pain fibres – known as the gate theory of pain
7)       The water and being surrounded by the pool creates a safe, cocoon like environment where a woman can let go of her surrounding and focus inward.
8)       Has been proven to help speed up a slow first stage of labour.
9)       Helps lower blood pressure, especially if the increase was due to anxiety.
10)   Give the mother the chance to birth upright and in a position she is comfortable with
11)   Birth partner can be very involved in the birth, some choose to be in the pool, others support from the side.
12)   Pushing stage is often shorter
13)   Gentle introduction into the world for the baby.
14)   A mother with a good birth experience and a baby with an easy non traumatic entry into the world have the best start together.
15)   The warm water softens the vagina, vulva, and perineum, leading to less tearing and need for stitches.

The most common concern that is usually raised about waterbirth is about the baby drowning. Babies only breathe when they receive stimulation like cold air on their skin, if the baby is born into warm body temperature water; there is no stimulus to start the breathing process. This only happen when the baby’s body is born and the baby is brought up to the surface.

If you are interested in have a waterbirth the best option may be to find an active birthing unit with a private midwife as they usually have the most experience in waterbirths. You can also choose to have a waterbirth at home with a midwife attending the birth. For more information on waterbirth you can visit our website www.earthbabies.co.za