Using values to raise my kids
by Jayshree Sita, mom to 2 gorgeous, lively kids, Amishka 9yrs and Vishen 5yrs. She traded the glamorous life of a chartered accountant to become a teacher. She’s also an aspiring writer and artist who is passionate about self-development and keeping her family happy.
I was once again frustrated with my 5 yr old because he did not want to get ready for school, and was wondering how best to get him to co-operate with the early morning routine. I’ve tried many times to have rules that we agree on, as well as incentive plans and punishments. Somehow, none seem to have worked consistently.
I remembered an idea in the Stephen Covey book, “7 Habits of Effective Families”…suggesting we formulate a family vision and mission statement, including a set of family values to guide us.
So, I thought that if we agreed on “punctuality” as a family value, this might work better than the “be on time or else…” philosophy.
I decided to define and agree on values together with my kids. This is what we came up with:
1. Be caring and kind to each other
2. Take care of our things
3. Have fun together
4. Be honest
5. Learn to say sorry
6. Be punctual
7. Share work
8. Respect privacy
9. Everyone gets a turn to talk, and the rest must listen without interrupting
10. Share stories
11. Learning is important
12. Say thank you every day
13. Everyone is unique and special in their own way
I must admit, drawing up this list felt a lot better than drawing up a list of rules. I felt great that my kids agreed to everything on the list- in fact they came up with a lot of it. I also know that agreeing on the values is only half the battle won, living by them will be the challenge.
Bearing in mind that we all learn by experience and not by words, I guess the journey has just begun.



this is a wonderful idea! may well try it out with my things too :-0
What a simple and yet fantastic idea….article was so nicely written…
I love the idea, this values will make everyone in the family to remember their values, especially the parents!
BRILLIANT.so glad so called ‘old fashioned’ values are still around.keep us posted as to how its going
Thanks for the positive feedback everyone. I decided to add one today.
Care for the earth and all living things.
- this will encourage appreciation of nature,
- kindness to animals, even bugs ( hopefully stop the random squishing of spiders which little boys are inclined to do)
-encourage caring and participating in community and charitable events
It’s mid term break now for us, so I hope to reinforce and put a lot of this stuff into practice. Wish me luck.